How Not To Build A Relationship With Your Mailing List

Hi all,

Today’s topic is about……..


What not to do when you email your list.


I received an email and it left such an impact on me that I went and recorded a video to talk about it and I’d like to know what you think.  So, listen to the video below.

Let me know what you think of this in the comments below.  Feel free to share this if you think others will like it.

Happy Holidays, just in case I don’t post anything before the end of the year.

Talk to you soon……Chris


22 thoughts on “How Not To Build A Relationship With Your Mailing List”

  1. Hi Chris and thanks for sharing your very realisitc and honest video.

    Hard to believe that solo ad provider would sent such an incedibly stupid and ignorant email.

    Hos email reeks of desperation and just maybe his solo ad business is not going as well as you think itbis.

    Anyway I would never do business with this person again and totally agree with your thoughts mate.

    My best wishes to you and your family for the festive season


    • Hi Peter,

      Welcome back and thanks for visiting again. I didn’t want to give the word
      “idiot” a bad rep by using it on this guy as you said on Facebook. 😉 Even “jerk is too nice of word
      but I didn’t want to swear twice in the video. Lol.

      I can’t imagine anyone staying on his list after being called thick-skulled. And to put down another
      source of leads is really over the top. There are plenty of people who are very successful on Facebook.

      He obviously thinks that solo ads are the only way to go, and he is so wrong.

      I hope you and yours have a safe remainder of the holiday season.

      Talk to you soon…..Chris

  2. Hey, Chris
    For some reason, I can’t see the video. Could be something wrong with my own set-up. Will come back later. Very, very curious about this, hahaha!


  3. Hi Chris. Obviously, this idiot is clearly a nutter. Thanks for the dialogue Being a new guy on the block, I am keen to learn how member’s web pages look, platform they use and content. If this is your 1st Video, you have done an excellent job in my humble view. How did you feel? What preparations did have to do and what was stress level like???

    From my experience in dealing with a range of walk in customers for 10 years, 99% are great and worth the time of day. Some come back a second time which tells me that I, as the Owner of the Business, they struck up an accord with me. This is the time to offer more products of a higher value and ultimately offer them a monthly account if they are in business somewhere. This will secure repeat business if they accept my offer. This is what all businesses seek is repeat business from regular, reliable, honest Clients. (Note the the original customer, has been turned into a Client).

    The remaining 1%ers are not worth the time of day as they are rude, arrogant, complaining about price and quality etc. I subtly let it be known that I take an immediate dislike to this person and ease them away from the premises. They may come back, so you repeat more forcibly this time that they are not welcome and to never come back. One’s own body language plays a major role in this mind game.

    Keep up the good work Chris and don’t let the bastards grind you down!!!

    Best Wishes for Christmas and Wealthy 2016!!

    Mike Hardy (Banbury, UK)

    • Hi Mike,

      Welcome to my little spot on the web. Glad you stopped by.
      Thanks for the good words about the video.

      To answer your questions, this was my first video blog post, but not my first video.
      How did I feel, great, no pressure. I read the email, put up my backdrop, started the camera
      and just started talking. I had no stress. I just said what I thought as I was reading the email
      to the camera.

      Actually, I found it easier to just started recording my thoughts instead of trying
      to type it out into words. Plus, people get to hear the real emotion in me coming out honestly.

      I hear you about trying to get repeat business to turn customers into clients. I was this guy’s
      customer once. Wasn’t happy with the results, but stayed on his mailing list. Every email was
      to promote his own thing. Never tried to build a good relationship with me. All about the money

      This last email was the end, between being called thick-headed, and bad mouthing another
      way to get leads was just too much. I wouldn’t tell my customers that they should only come to
      me because Joe Smith’s product or service sucks. I would just continue to provide great value
      and let them decide whether they want to keep coming back or not.

      Good luck on your journey and welcome to iPro.

      Have a great week….Chris

  4. Dear Chris,
    HYPOCRISY is an understatement for this guy. I loved your post it made me laugh, especially the part about “wa wa wa” like a big baby.
    What this guy teaches you is how not to be. I do believe nice guys finish well and idiots finish up. You are good to bring this up because there are a lot of people out there doing it differently and it comes off as “I don’t really care but sign up and give me your money anyway”.
    I think the worst thing someone can do is to bag the competition so they can put themselves forward.
    Very immature. I automatically don’t trust people who are trying to be your friend or sell you something by bringing another down first.
    Anyway thanks for sharing it was great, I loved it.

    • Hi Jennifer,

      Thanks for the return visit.

      This guy definitely hit a nerve with me as soon as he made the thick skull remark. That’s not how you keep a customer on your list. Between that, and the badmouthing of anyone who uses social media to generate leads was too much. Then, to use it all as a lead in to his own service was the final straw.

      Politicians work like that, put down the opponents’s political views to promote their own.

      There’s no know, like or trust being built there. Actions, or in this case words, are what count. His words did nothing but make me leave his list and his services forever.

      I’m glad you liked the video.

      Have a great rest of the holiday season…………Chris

    • Hi Roy.

      Thanks for visiting and commenting.

      I wrote this because it hit a nerve and also to show people how not to talk to their list if they are involved in email marketing. People don’t want to be called names. They also don’t like to be told that they are wrong if they do something other than what the sender promotes right there in the same email.

      As we know from our iPro training, this is not the way to build a relationship with our lists and it certainly doesn’t create the know, like and trust needed to warm up our subscribers.

      Have a great 2016….Chris

  5. Hi Chris

    You’re right, he is an asshole!

    The guy is using provocation as a way to get people’s attention. By the sounds of it, he’s not very good at it.

    Thanks for reminding us about what not to do


    • Hi Kim.

      Thanks for visiting my site and you’re welcome.

      Glad you liked and got something out of this video.
      Just thought it was something that marketers in general, and
      email marketers in particular need to know.

      Have a great week…..Chris

  6. Hi Chris

    Yup, I totally agree.

    However, this kind of thing doesn’t only happen online or in email. I recently attended a seminar where the presenter did just that.

    Something like, “Don’t do this, I hate it when people do it. Don’t pay for that cr*p. They’re full of sh*t!”

    And the next thing you know, they were doing exactly that AND upselling their program that helps you do it over XX months. Some people!

    • Hi Rhonda.

      Thanks for visiting my little spot on the web.

      I’m sure it happens more than we think in all venues when it
      comes to marketing. I’ve only experienced it with this one guy
      through an email so I focused on that.

      I’m a firm believer of letting people decide for themselves whether one way
      is better than another. I certainly won’t condemn anyone for whichever way
      they choose to go.

      I could’ve easily mentioned his name to let people know what he is doing,
      but I’m not in this to ruin anyone’s business. I just wasn’t happy with how
      he did it and thought people should know that it isn’t the right way to do it.

      Thanks for the informative comment.
      Have a great week………..Chris

  7. Hi Chris,

    First let me say I liked seeing you on video. What better way to convey this message to us. I don’t blame you at all. What a stupid email!

    This is one surefire way to loose a customer. Putting people or products down is not a good way to go. Well, unless you want a bunch of sheeple to follow you but then you will just go around in circles.

    I’ve seen this on emails, ads and even webinars or tele-seminars. Reminds me of what my father used to say “Every knock is a boost” meaning that when people knock you down, they are only trying to boost themselves up.

    You could have mentioned his name but you my friend have integrity. Thanks for that!


    • Hi Donna.

      Thanks for coming back and for the kind words.

      This was one of those times where it was easier to just get in front
      of the camera and share the email and my thoughts as they were
      happening instead of trying to type them.

      Like someone said to me, it allowed people to see my emotions.

      It’s one thing to have an opinion on something but another to
      put it down to justify purchasing your own product or service.
      Never mind the name calling. Especially to those on your
      mailing list.

      Have a great week……….Chris

  8. Good point. When someone does that he’s just taking value from his own product.
    As the old saying goes ” I’m not who you think I am, you are who you think I am.”

    • Hi Wail.

      Thanks for visiting.

      Every time I received an email from him, it was just to promote
      his own services or products. Nothing ever to try to gain that
      know, like and trust factor. Maybe it was because I had used
      his service once (never again) and was on his buyers list. I
      don’t know. All I know is he came on looking very rude with
      that particular email. It felt like he is in it strictly for the money
      and doesn’t care how he goes about making a sale.

      I did unsubscribe from his list after that.

      Have a good one…….Chris

  9. Very humorous post! I think the video option was the best form of media for this message, so great choice! I don’t think words could have conveyed what your non-verbal language did.

    • Hi Debra.

      Thanks for visiting. I’m glad you liked the video.

      Yes, this was on of those occasions where putting it in writing wasn’t
      going to get the point across as well as it would on video.

      People need to realize that they don’t need to put down other ways
      to generate traffic, as was this case, just to promote their own services.
      And never use name calling, especially to an email list, to try to get their point across.

      It’s just bad business. I could’ve mentioned his name but I’m not
      in it to hurt others. I just won’t use him again.

      Have a good one…….Chris

  10. Hey Chris,

    Great to see you on video and I can tell you were pretty fired up about this one.

    I had to laugh when you called him an asshole. LOL!!!

    That just goes to show that 1) he either is ignorant on the way you do things or 2) he’s definitely being taught the wrong way. To put other platforms down like that definitely shows a lack of integrity on his part but I’m sure there is someone out there buying into this which is a shame.

    I’m all about connecting with others and I have sent emails asking about someone but I don’t lead in asking a lot of personal questions. I also don’t do it to generate business but if that’s what comes from it later on then I’m happy. It should be about building those connections with others and helping each other down the road. I’m pretty sure this guy is doing horribly in this area.

    Glad you vented your frustrations and glad I’m not on that guys list.


    • Hi Adrienne.

      Thanks for stopping by again.

      I’m glad you liked the video. This was one of those times where text wasn’t going to cut it.
      I try to be nice, but sometimes you have to call it as you see it, thus the swear.

      I’ve been taught that you need to build a good relationship with your readers and subscribers. Name calling is not the way to get it done. Then, to bad mouth a different way to generate leads and the have the audacity to blatantly promote yours as the only and correct way to do it. All kinds of wrong going on there.

      Sad thing is, this guy is supposed to be among the best when it comes to solo ad providers. Wrong!!
      I used him once. I got what I paid for with a little extra as far as clicks go. But, there was no interaction after the fact. Never got any stats from him, which he promised. So much about the money and nothing else.

      I could’ve mentioned his name, but I’m not like that. I just made up my mind to let people know what not to do and removed myself from his list.

      Have a great weekend……..Chris

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